When I Get Upset

As a rule, I do not get that upset at what I do in a day. No. What really upsets me is what I don't do in a day.

Sins of omission:  Any sane person would think I have it backwards and that the things I don't get done shouldn't bother me. Well that sounds nice until visitors come by. For me, as a mom, the things that don't get done in a day lend themselves to unsanitary conditions, fire hazards, stupidity, chronic misbehavior, and insanity. You'll forgive me if I seem upset with myself at the end of the day when the house is still a mess, and people are hungry and freaking out because I took a day to relax; a day I will be paying for for the next week or so.

No! Not one more "emergency" until I finish this blog!

Sins of undervalue: Society expects me to define myself and my worth by  a career outside of the home, and makes no secret of its disdain for my decision to stay home with my children. That wouldn't be so bad either if the doctrine had not been drilled into my brains and emotions all my life by a liberal school environment and popular media. Thirty-odd years of consistent secular indoctrination and reinforcement can not be shrugged off at will.

According to the above theories I am expected to be a career woman at the same time as a child care expert, nurse, cook, hairdresser and fashion consultant, teacher, housekeeper, therapist, referee and coach, administrator, and lover, among every other duty motherhood and married life entails.

I just want a day or two to myself to get the house clean. Is that so much to ask?

2008 and 2009

After Christmas, it was just too much to stay on my feet working, so I left work and stayed home, a decision I never regretted.

In His Light, by Greg Olsen*

In April, Colin was born. When I first heard his cry I had never heard anything more beautiful in my life. Maybe you remember that I had wondered last year whether the Lord knows happiness as great as his suffering. The answer then came to me: Yes. The Lord knows joy. He knows happiness to match His pain.

My experience in parenting is teaching me how to love in the same way that the Lord loves.

Overall, the first year as parents was blissfully uneventful. Colin was a healthy, sweet natured boy who made everyone he met fall in love with him.

There isn't a whole lot for me to say personally about the year as mostly it revolved around Colin. My world became very small.

My dad remarried, which I am sure was an adventure in and of itself, but that's his story. We also met some great family and friends. That's about it.

In 2009, Aaron and I were expecting again. We also decided to move to Logan, UT for Aaron to attend Utah State University. That was a rough summer and fall. Our friends were very generous and patient, but we just couldn't get settled in a place of our own, so we came back to Michigan at the end of the semester.

What was wonderful about the experience was that the difficulty made our little family stronger.

This is not my most entertaining blog entry; but as a rule, simple, normal things happen when you start a family. I like it that way.

You may have noticed, if you are following this blog, that I'm not focusing on the painful parts of life that much. I might make a minor gripe once in a while when it's funny; but for the most part the only times I've mentioned the dark parts are in reference to how my life is better for the experience.

I don't think people like to read whining and complaining. For my part, I hate the "Woah is me" stories that so many people tell online, or worse, over the pulpit at church. There's enough negative energy in this world without my adding to it. When life gives you lemons, have fish for dinner.

*About that picture and link. It is to Greg Olsen's online gallery and store. I can usually tell one of his paintings, and his art is all over the internet, but seldom credited to him properly, which is a dirty crying shame. Click the link and you'll be in his store and see more of his amazing paintings.